dragonspell
19 April 2009 @ 02:35 am
The 6 Stages of Yaoi  
I typed this out on a whim (took about five minutes) but apparently it resonates with some people, so I just wonder how true it is. xD Fun little thing.

The 6 stages of yaoi:

First initial encounter, you recoil reflexively, looking around guiltily and saying a quick "ew" in case anyone might be watching and judging. But you do look again. xD

Second stage, you're no longer denying yourself, but you're hiding it. You tend to like the girly ukes (useless chicks with dicks) and the big strong semes to be macho men and take care of everybody. Basically barely disguised romance novels. xD

Third stage. You're hardcore now. You just have yet to know how deep you're going. You open up a bit, start looking at semes as more than a 2D stereotype and the ukes can be a bit less girly. But you're still all about the roles. Hardcore.

Fourth stage. You're obsessed. And you've probably run across the Western "slash" circles that have violated your sensibilities with their unconcern about how they list their pairings and who tops who. Also, because of the slash influences (and probably because you're getting older xD ), you're starting to like the bigger men. You write hardcore fanfiction and/or draw. Plus you'll write essays on any subject somebody will let you.

Fifth stage: It's all good baby. Tied up, tied down, up against the wall! You're there. You might be starting to develop a hatred, though of certain kinds of yaoi just due to an overdose (see the overly emotional girly ukes). You're also actively trying to convert all your rl friends (and probably have been through the last few stages (even the guys (especially your boyfriend))). You're a kinky, kinky bitch. You're all about shaking things up. Because you've seen everything else!

Final Stage 1: You're chill. You'll mellow. Yaoi has invaded every pore of your life and you just can't imagine life without it. In fact, you don't even think about such things like that. You just go with it. Of COURSE you'd like this movie because of the hinting. xD You're also starting to come down off the NO CHICKS allowed vibe though occasionally you knee jerk defensively (usually with due cause, though).

OR

Final Stage 2: The yaoi circles have ruined you. You're burnt out. You just can't take the rigid "rules" anymore ("height rule", "age rule", etc). You either abandon yaoi forever for the more tolerant slash circles or you abandon everything all together. Sad, sad life. =(

(I tend to waffle between Stage 5 and Final Stage Option 1).